


In Dean's Mind

by JohnlockintheTARDISwithDestiel



Category: Supernatural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-22
Updated: 2013-11-22
Packaged: 2018-01-02 07:29:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1054113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JohnlockintheTARDISwithDestiel/pseuds/JohnlockintheTARDISwithDestiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wrote this as a final project for English and my tumblr followers wanted proof. It's a Dean Narrative basically. P.S. for some reason AO3 won't keep in my paragraph breaks all the time so sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Dean's Mind

It all started two months before my fifth birthday. My little brother Sammy was six months old and sleeping in his crib. Some stupid freaking demon, Azazel, was in there bleeding into my Sam’s mouth to turn him into some freak psychic dude for some sort of army or something; it’s complicated. Anyway Mom heard some noises and went into Sam’s room to check on him. At first she thought the guy standing over my little bro was my dad, John, but when she went back to their room Dad was asleep in bed. She sorta freaked out and ran back into Sammy’s room hoping to gank the dude threatening her son. Azazel saw her and put her on the ceiling and set her on fire then left as he was done with his job. My dad woke up to the sound of my mom screaming and woke me up.  
“Dean! Get your brother! Get Sam and leave now!!” My dad had screamed. He looked like super sad as he stared at my mother sprawled out on the burning ceiling. He grabbed a few things and ran out the front door to meet me and Sam. Sam had been crying and screaming but I’d managed to calm him back into sleep. Dad grabbed my arm and yanked me into our car. He drove and drove until he found a hotel where we stayed for three nights. Dad started leaving a lot and coming home with big books that were freaky looking and scared me a little bit. There was just something about em. They just seemed-I dunno-off. You see, after Mom’s death, Dad became obsessed with hunting monsters. Ya know, demons, ghosts, vampires; just your everyday supernatural trouble makers. Anyway so basically Sammy decided to leave for Stanford after high school. Dad freaked out about it and I gotta admit it made me pretty sad to see him go but whatever. But at one point Dad went missing so I went and got Sammy. Then that son of a poptart Azazel killed Sam’s girlfriend Jessica. Sam went with me and now we gank demons and such just like our dad did. Oh yeah and he sorta died to save my life. Pretty asparagused up life we got goin on.  
Sometimes I think Sam doesn’t really appreciate me. Not that I deserve it I mean, I'm a real screw up and I obviously didn’t do well with Sammy as a kid. But I dunno I at least want him to like me. Again not that I’d deserve it; I don’t really deserve anything from anyone, especially not Sam. Whether he appreciates me or not I’ll always protect him from anything. No matter what the cost. I even sold my soul so that he’d live a few years ago. He was pretty mad about that. I was too, when Dad did it. But that’s different cause he deserves it I didn’t. Sam is smart and strong and I’m a highschool dropout with two bucks to his name. Anyway John was a great dad and I would do anything for him but I think Bobby Singer was more of a dad to Sam and I. I mean, he was around more. He would take us to baseball games and teach us how to fish. Dad only taught us how to shoot and perform an exorcism and stuff like that. But recently, Bobby died. This guy, Dick Roman, shot him. I can’t wait to kill him. I guess in a way it’s all Cas’s fault. Castiel is an angel. He’s also my best friend and just over all this really cool guy. He rescued me from hell and even defied several direct orders from God for me so I like him alright. But I can’t blame it on him it wasn’t his fault. You see he had this bright idea to become God because his heavenly father or whatever was nowhere to be found. He absorbed all the souls from purgatory to achieve his insane goal. When I convinced him to put them back, a few latched on to his soul. Leviathans; the worst sons of poptarts to ever exist in the world. Dick Roman is one of those guys. But anyway really it’s my fault for not doing more to convince Cas not to become God. So now the only real father I’ve ever had is gone and I don’t know what to do with myself.  
A couple weeks ago on a hunt someone told me it helped to fake smile. That isn’t really working though cause it’s not bringing Bobby back now is it. I haven’t had the courage to go back to Bobby’s place and get his stuff yet and I’m not sure if I’ll ever really be ready. I have to though so Sam and I begin heading that way. He lives in Sioux Falls, South Dakota and we were all the way down in Tallahassee, Florida, so it would be a pretty long drive for us.  
When we arrive at Bobby’s large dirty house I have to suck in a sharp breath to keep from breaking down. Rows and Rows of broken down cars smolder in the sun behind the raggedy old house. We walked up to the porch and opened the broken down door. Inside, books lay scattered across tables and chairs and even the floor. White lines of salt were placed strategically throughout the house for convenience and precaution. Sam headed up stairs to the room he always stayed in to collect some of his things but I stayed behind. I walked over to the rotting oak table and sat down to take it all in. There, on the table, was a letter written on old yellowing paper addressed to me. I recognized the uncharacteristically neat handwriting of Bobby spreading across the page. I cautiously picked up the frail letter and began reading:  
Dean-  
God I hope you don’t have to read this. It means I’m dead which I’m guessing you already know unless you’re snooping in which case I would kindly ask you stop ya idjit. And if you’re Sam, stop reading this is for Dean can’t you read. (Dean cracked a smile at this.) Anyway so I’m writing this to DEAN AND ONLY DEAN because (Sam if you’re still reading stop now or I’ll kick your cake from the grave) Dean I know I can count on you. And again if this is Sam sorry but currently you’re only a toddler and I don’t know ya well enough yet. I’m not leaving this to John cause, we’re great friends but I wouldn’t trust that man as far as I can throw him which is probably not far. I mean he’s practically leaving you to raise Sam for god’s sake. Well anyway I always leave this out on the table after leaving for a hunt just in case so that must be how you found it. I just wanted to let you know that all your spare IDs are in the safe under my bed. The combination is 12452 (Dean stared at the number for a moment before realizing those were Dean and Sam’s birthdays: January 24th, and May 2nd.) there’s also some money in there can’t say how much cause who knows when I’ll die but whenever I get some spare money I put it in there for you two. I’ve also got some phone numbers of people to tell I’m dead and people to call for help since you won’t have me anymore. Now I hope you two gave me the hunter’s send off cause if not you can bet your cake I’ll be hauntin you till you do. I hope you boys know how much I love you. Not to get all girlie here and softie but I do. I never had children of my own but I think of you as my adopted kids cause I took care of you so often and I love you more than anything else in the world. And Dean, I know you don’t think highly of yourself but I can’t imagine why. You’re a great hunter and even though I know you wish you were, you’re nothing like your daddy and believe me that’s a good thing. So stay alive boys, I’ll see you wherever one day and hopefully that isn’t too soon. And know that no matter what, I will always be proud of you. You will never do anything to let me down.  
-Bobby  
I wiped the tears from my eyes as I heard Sam’s massive feet on the stairs and stuffed the note in my pocket. “Good.” I thought “He’s proud of me. I didn’t let him down.” That’s all I ever really needed to know. I could finally move on a little and not dwell so much on his death cause I knew that no matter what, he was proud. I smiled and stood up knowing that I could finally find some happiness. Sam rummaged around looking for useful things but I just stood there; taking in the moment. 


End file.
